Are You a Malaysian?

I don't know about you but I know the Rukun Negara by heart. Easily. Ask me anytime and I can recite it eloquently, with flair and style, I might add.
Now, do you know your Rukun Negara?
Bet you don't. Ok. Maybe a couple of lines and then zzzzt. Blank.
Shame on you! Call yourself a Malaysian. And what kind of Malaysian are you? Not a good one, obviously.
Now before you lay any of that pseudo liberal crap on me, let me explain.
It is incumbent upon you as a citizen of this country to know its "rukun negara". Other countries are no different.
Don't like this? You wanna run away to the good ole US of A because you think its draconian to make you remember the Rukun Negara?
Go, baby, go. You have to take a test and take an oath and pledge of loyalty too.
What is so difficult about knowing your Rukun Negara? It does not make you a right wing fascist if you believe in it.
You may have problems with the Government and some of its leaders, but you cannot hate the country and the Rukun Negara.
If you have school-going kids, just borrow one of their exercise books or "buku latihan". The Rukun Negara is printed on the back cover.
Now, let me guide you:

BAHAWASANYA NEGARA KITA MALAYSIA mendukung cita-cita hendak :

• mencapai perpaduan yang lebih erat di kalangan seluruh masyarakatnya ;
• memelihara satu cara hidup demokratik ;
• mencipta satu masyarakat adil di mana kemakmuran Negara akan dapat dinikmati bersama secara adil dan saksama ;
• menjamin satu cara liberal terhadap tradisi-tradisi kebudayaannya yang kaya dan berbagai corak ; dan
• membina satu masyarakat progresif yang akan menggunakan sains dan teknologi moden.

MAKA KAMI, rakyat Malaysia, berikrar akan menumpukan seluruh tenaga dan usaha kami untuk mencapai cita-cita tersebut berdasarkan atas prinsip-prinsip berikut :

• KEPERCAYAAN KEPADA TUHAN
• KESETIAAN KEPADA RAJA DAN NEGARA
• KELUHURAN PERLEMBAGAAN
• KEDAULATAN UNDANG-UNDANG
• KESOPANAN DAN KESUSILAAN

Translated, it is :

Our nation, Malaysia, being dedicated :

• to achieving a greater unity of all her peoples;
• to maintaining a democratic way of life;
• to creating a just society in which the wealth of the nation shall be equitably shared;
• to ensuring a liberal approach to her rich and diverse cultural traditions;
• to building a progressive society which shall be oriented to modern science and technology;

We, her peoples, pledge our united efforts to attain these ends guided by these principles:

• BELIEF IN GOD
• LOYALTY TO KING AND COUNTRY
• UPHOLDING THE CONSTITUTION
• RULE OF LAW
• GOOD BEHAVIOUR AND MORALITY

Okay, for you agnostics and free-thinkers out there, the first line is tough. And for you pseudo-liberals, the last line isn't up your short skirts and g-strings.
But, that aint so difficult, huh?

Just Screw Them!

That's what you do to people who shoot their mouth! Men or women, it don't matter.
They need a good screw.
People who are starved of real good sex talk cock.
They get kinda disoriented.
So, what they all need is a good screw!

Love 'Em, Hate 'Em

Men! You love them. You hate them. You can live with them. You can't live without them.
This was something said about women by men a very long time ago. Well, not by real men. But MCPs. You know, oink oink. There's one right behind you.
Men are so predictable that you know what they are up to and they don't even know that we know what they are up to.
That's why it aint difficult to catch 'em with their pants down.
Gawd! You must have heard of at least one story about a man whose wife/woman caught him with his pants down, and he kept saying, "I didn't do it, I didn't do it". What a creep!
Here's the thing. Men cannot live without women. That's the truth, buster.
They need women. They need a fuck. They always need a damn fuck!
Tell me. Do you know of any man who can live without women? Without screwing?
Without women, they'd be screwing any damn hole they see, I tell ya.
That's also why it's so easy to get them into your pants. Piece of cake.
They're so pathetically weak that it makes you just want to walk over them. That's after you get them to do what you want them to do.
Men! Love 'em or hate 'em.
Or just fuck 'em.